i'm as calm as a fruit stand in new york and maybe as strange

hungry and cold and hungry and cold, cold like the dead under a few feet of snow in the frozen frozen winter ground

yup. i'm a fuckwit of sorts, been on campus all damn day half-assedly going at a composition project i need to be done with by tomorrow at one thirty.

woot.

wholly unwholesome dirty mess. fingernails jagged with grime underneath.
egregiously greasy and unpleasantly itchy as well.

missed much of sleep, at the club for halloween, drowning in rail whiskey and generic lemon lime soda once more. had the fortune somehow to wake up for class on time this morn, despite the passing out without setting my alarm at 4 or 5 in the morning. class was at 9:05.

all day i have gone without eating except my lovely friend and t.a. of electronic music class shared dried fruit with me. i should have gone home and took a nap and some baked potatoes and then returned late to work on progress b/c sitting here all day has been none too fruitful with the distractions of sleepy and hungry. not to mention cold. did i mention yet that i am very cold?

but last nite before the club i went trick or treating wtih some good friends and that was of course quite pleasant. it is nice to walk about a neighborhood actually speaking to people who live there, though it wasn't my neighborhood. i guess i could talk to people in my neighborhood more when i happen to see them but unfortunately i am shy and hate people.

that isn't true. neither really are. i am intensely nervous about speaking to people i don't know/know well but i am not exactly shy. and i generally like people but sometimes, oftentimes even, want naught to do with them. and i guess the problem with getting to know my neighbors is that then they'd, like, talk to me, whenever i happened into them.

what hell is wrong with me, eh?

enough transmission for today, for this moment anyway, i have stuff to be doing.

snowflakes, not yet.