not bad

so, some fooling around with the boy today, mentioned him in prior post. he's a real sweetheart. i'm feeling pretty happy, though a little nervous that he might somehow be less into it than I... but I think we're pretty much on the same page...

the problem with me is that I am kind of confused about what I want out of it... I don't really want a full fledged gung ho romantic committed relationship. But I like the guy. I want the guy to like me. At the moment, I think it's good. Really, I'm grinning ear to ear, but am still a little paranoid that maybe he's dissatisfied somehow or something... yeah.

I am not sure why I feel compelled to let the whole internet know this, especially considering I am not even all that anonymous here ...

Dorkus Dumbassus, yeah.

oh well, boy doesn't know about my blog yet. not all that many people do. so it's okay... might as well just piss it all out in the vast anonymous pool of the internet... (chlorine? whatever...)
(does this metaphor suck? hmm.)
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of course I am still broken-hearted over the crush of 2 years that ain't interested in me. aagh. but then, the boy I'm foolin' with now and I aren't a serious item... we're going to move on at some point. hopefully he'll find a woman that will really appreciate him...

see neither of us are necessarily that attractive, though honestly i think he is(now that I know him, and before I knew him I didn't make a judgement, I actually do care more about what a person's like and value whole selves over mere appearances)...
and apparently he thinks I am too or we wouldn't be messing about...
i dunno. he's been single for a while, and laments not being appreciated as he deserves b/c he ain't hot and people pay more attention to looks than personality... of course, I agree. Hopefully we can help eachother a bit.
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ah internet, here I go telling you all my secrets...